Burgers, fries, and a Bud Light don’t taste right.
Yes, I know that rhymes.
I started my second week of the Couch to 5k plan last night. I was so tired from the weekend my rationalization won over and I stayed in bed late, so I was forced to run after work. Normally I would tell myself bowling league that night was going to be enough so I guess this plan is serving its purpose already.
I roll into the gym at a little after eight and it is packed tighter than my thighs in my new running capris. Semi-fitted my ghetto ass. Most of the treadmills are taken, which means I can’t obey my lone wolf rule. My lone wolf rule means I don’t want anyone next to me at the gym. This rule is strictly enforced in the land of the treadmills, but loosely obeyed at the elliptical machines.
I give the back wall a scan. Now, who is going to be not embarrassing to pant next to? Trick question. Everyone is going to be embarrassing. Ok, who is going to be the least embarrassing?
I narrow the wolfpack to two options. I can be next to a robust lady who is walking briskly. I will not make fun of her. She is at the gym just like me trying to make some progress. Besides, if she is in better shape than me, it adds to the embarrassment.
My other option is a girl walking at a slower pace. She looks like she is in full walking mode and will barely notice me, so I fall in next to her and get started.
A few minutes in she starts running. Damn, I got duped by the warm-up walk. Well, it’s not all about me. Hopefully I’m the most aggressive people-watcher at the gym and I’m just being paranoid.
I had to increase my intervals this week. It wasn’t so bad; except for the pain my body is starting to feel. I should not have done that extra cardio session on Sunday, and I really should have stretched more. My legs were burning with every thundering (my thundering I mean I sounded like a Cylesdale over Alice
I finish my run and head off to bowling league. I didn’t pack a protein shake and I’m starving. Damn, that whole Girl Scout being prepared thing was probably more than always having a corkscrew and a bottle opener in your purse (which I do). That’s probably why I was never in the Scouts. And my cookies probably wouldn’t have made it to the customer. Thin Mints….right.
Anyway, the bowling alley doesn’t make salads and I’m not sure I would want one if they did. Old habits die hard and I guess I’m just forced to get a burger and fries. Must as well get a beer too. Light beer.
You know, it just didn’t taste right. In fact, a burger, fries, and a beer just don’t taste right after a run. It’s like my body is telling me, “Really Fatty? Do you really need this now? After all you put me through?”
Well that didn’t stop me from getting a second beer. It is bowling league after all. When in Rome
“I don’t think you’re ready for this jelly…”
Ah yes, Beyonce’. My body is too bootylicious for you babe. Is the god of nine-pin no tap league trying to tell me to stop being an idiot and close my tab? Maybe. I followed the advice, but the damage is done. I feel huge and my entire lower body hurts from the run and three games of shitty bowling.
This is my second week and it’s already a shit show. I started wondering how it is going to be when I actually do a 5k. I was planning on just working up to the distance, but now it’s kind of anti-climatic if I don’t do a public one. Everyone keeps asking me if I have registered for one. I am trying to give myself ample time to work up the distance, and then get acclimated to running outside, but I’m also very afraid. How am I going to run around so many people when I have to be selective about my gym spots?
I guess that’s another reason to do this, I’m tired of being embarrassed.
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